Pages

April 18, 2012

1,000 Words

The saying goes that a picture is worth a thousand words. My goal for this is to describe what happened in exactly one thousand words. Wish me luck. If you’re keeping track, the end of this sentence is thirty-nine.

When I first saw this picture I thought nothing of it. I said, “well, that is New Orleans.” But usually when you look at a piece of art you think nothing of it until you stop and think about it for a while. Staring at it for a couple minutes also helps. I submit to you now that this is a piece of art.


Off in the distance, in the way back, the way way back, you see this bridge, tall and illustrious, leading to who knows where and you see power lines going somewhere and coming from somewhere.
At first, I see houses, many houses with roofs. Some of the houses look pretty decent while one, that white one right in the center of the picture, looks beat up, abandoned, and in need of help. The paint is chipping and some of the windows look broken.

A little closer now the houses look pretty well maintained. The siding looks good, the roof isn’t faded and the window has a screen over it to keep out bugs.

But then there is this awkward looking green and yellow hump on the top of the roof. After you look at it awhile you see that it is a bunch of yellow flowers blooming, showing off their beauty to earth and sky.

And then focusing on the picture as a whole you see beauty, brokenness, and a bridge all within the same picture. A picture worth a thousand words. And now I find myself interpreting what this means. Why is the bridge so far away? Why is beauty and brokenness so close together? What is the story behind the brokenness and the beauty, or, what is the story behind the story?

I find this picture intriguing because it offers a simplified version of life in a community.

Yes, this is a common sight in the city of New Orleans. Abandoned houses next to perfectly livable houses. It was a hurricane that caused the separation between the beauty and the broken. Some people got through their brokenness, while others are still in it. As the abandoned houses get more broken, the livable houses keep going. God showed me what community was while I was down in New Orleans.

But what about the bridge? What does that mean? When you go over a large bridge you are usually exiting or entering a city. A city is a busy place usually. Life can be busy sometimes too. Do you ever have that moment where you think, “I just want to get out of here, away from it all. I just want a new surrounding, a place away from the busyness.” If you have; you might be looking for a bridge to cross, to get away from it all.

The bridge is something deeper than that though. The bridge is an escape towards a perfect place. I have to remind myself that this is earth, and earth is broken, and earthly things break, like houses. I look forward towards heaven, where nothing will be broken, everything will be beautiful and we get to worship that beauty. That’s how I view the bridge. A reminder that heaven is coming.

The church we partnered with in New Orleans, Castle Rock Community Church, is intentional at being a community of people. They recognize the brokenness, and show them beauty. They recognize the area around them and notice a need, and do their best to make things beautiful. God makes beautiful things. I mean, look at those flowers.
It was in New Orleans where I realized that this picture isn’t just specific to New Orleans but it can also be applied to any community. There is a need wherever you go. You can find places that have beauty and brokenness right across the street.

The community down there realizes the beauty in the brokenness and stemming from that realization they put themselves out there to make a community. A park that was notorious for drugs deal and shootings is now a safe place for kids to play and ride their bikes.

God also revealed to me that I have to recognize the brokenness in my own life and in order to eliminate that brokenness I have to eliminate the “do not disturb” sign I wear around my next, eliminate my pride, and reveal to the community my hurts and struggles. C.S. Lewis describes pride as the Great Sin. Pride is at the core of selfishness. I am a selfish person.

Jesus was the one that did life with the broken. Mark 2:17 Jesus says, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” Jesus goes to the broken and makes them beautiful. There is this rapper named Kanye West, and there is a line in one of his songs that I find absolutely beautiful. It goes, “To the hustlers, killers, murderers, drug dealers, even the strippers, Jesus walks with them” Think of the story of the Good Samaritan and the beauty of healing the broken.

Last, but not least. God revealed to me spiritual joy. I find myself smiling at random times during the day thinking about something that happened in New Orleans. I left Bethel with 9 people and came back with a community. We now tweet each other inside jokes, except three of you, who refuse to join the Twitter nation. Hashtag get at me.

New Orleans is a beautiful place filled with beautiful people. That house in the middle of the picture is a beautiful place because it is broken. That brokenness represents vulnerability, openness, and an opportunity. Our life is this picture.

And there it is; New Orleans in exactly one thousand words. Thank You.

April 07, 2012

April 04, 2012

Legacy

It's about 1:00am on Sunday night.

I had some pop about three hours ago. Big mistake, I'll be up all night probably.

So I bought the Gungor album and am sitting totally awake in a dark dorm room with new music playing through my headphones as my roommates sleep soundly. For those of you who ask; the Gungor album is pretty good so far, a good use of my gift card I got for Christmas. Thank you to whoever got that for me.

I have been haunted lately.

I had a conversation with a friend a few days ago while eating Chipotle that has caused this haunting. It went something like this:
FRIEND: "so what are you doing with the rest of your night?"
ME: "oh you know, changing the world." (said sarcastically, I actually had nothing to do)
FRIEND: "oh, and how would you do that?" (in a semi-serious manner)
ME: "um...(caught off guard)...I dunno...water. I would build wells...you know...people need water."

Graduation is a mere fifty-four days away.

When people ask me what it is like being a senior in college and if I am excited to graduate I usually reply by saying, "It's a little scary, but it's also exciting." It's true, the future is scary, but it is also exciting. New things in life can be exciting.

I have had a lot of thoughts about my future, you know, finding a job, that sort of thing.
I have also had a lot of thoughts about my past, and what I am leaving behind.

It is an emotional roller coaster; being a senior and all. Much more than I anticipated. I mean, I was a senior once already, how different can it be? I've had this great experience of committing four years of my life to learning a specific area and how to implement that into the real world. So it's exciting to look ahead at my potential in my future job market. It is also sad looking back at all the great memories I have had here at college and thinking about them leads to a small empty feeling and me almost crying.

It's like I'm not quite satisfied yet.

And there's more to it. Questions that pester me. What am I actually leaving behind? Have I changed at all? Has my community changed at all? Is my college experience to "normal" or to consistent? Have I just gone with the flow? What have I actually done in my time here? What kind of legacy am I leaving? Is it counter-intuitive?

That is the questions that have bugged me fifty-four days from graduation. Instead of letting them pass by or forget about them, I decided to confront them.

Head on.

And resulting from those questions I have come to a conclusion:

I want to change the world.
I want to do that by building a well.

Better yet, I want my community to change the world and I want us to do that by building a well. I want a community somewhere in the world to have fresh, clean water. I've gone all my life never having to travel far to get clean water, but there are people out there that have to travel hours back and forth, each day, just to get water that isn't even all that clean.

Now, for awhile I thought I was going crazy. I mean, who does this? Who tries to raise $5,000 so close to graduating? So I emailed my RA team, asking them if I was going crazy or if this was actually something worth pursuing.

They told me I should go for it and offered their suggestions and help.
The Holy Spirit must be real and must have a sense of humor. I thought for sure I was going nuts.

So now I am not only questioning my future and finding a job, but I am also putting into question my past and what I have done, or what I have to show, in my four years of college.

Later in life, when someone asks me about my college experience I would like to smile and tell them, "I had a great college experience. I met some great people and together we built a well for a community that now has access to clean water."

Ok, now I'm tearing up, stupid Gungor instrumental ending, why do you do this to me?